Batsh*t Crazy…Why Narcissists Make Your Head Explode!

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We all know them; we work with them,  interact with them at events, parties, numerous social gatherings, school  and yes, they’re even in our  families. The ever-present all-consuming ones who create drama…they feed off volatile situations like legendary vampires feed off human blood. They go from person to person telling tales of imaginary wrongs foisted upon them by the abundance of bad people who always mean them ill-will. And believe me, it’s always and forever someone else and never them.

They can’t keep a job because the boss, lets see — hates them, is jealous of them, less intelligent than them, less deserving of the title than them and we can’t forget the “isms”, no need to name them. Never-mind the insignificant little details that may involve tardiness, insubordination, arrogance and possible incompetence. That’s conveniently left out of the conversation because…wait for it, it’s not their fault! Shhhhhhhh….

If their relationships or marriages fall apart, of course, they’re the injured party and here comes the pity express. Need I say more. They rant, rave, pout, whine, storm out of rooms like crazy people, point fingers, foster hellish and nightmarish situations that an Academy Award winning screenwriter couldn’t possibly dream up in a thousand years. But somehow in their twisted sense of self, they will never own up to being the writer, director, editor, executive producer and star of their own melodrama or in many cases, horror film.

Oh, and lest I forget, how they can drag other people into their bizarre psychotic episodes. They can have you embroiled in conflicts that you have no knowledge of until you start receiving texts, Facebook messages, Tweets, phone calls and emails asking to explain. And your first thought is what the fuck is going on?????? Then you call them on their bullshit and out comes the righteous indignation; head explosion part deux!

exploding-head

 

Who am I talking about….energy vampires, malignant narcissists, self-absorbed morons, all about me jerks and batshit crazy loonies who live in a world created by them, for them and about them. No matter what, they can take a perfectly happy day and obliterate it into dust. When the meme “misery loves company” was invented, it was a person who was victimized by one of these foreboding creatures.

So people, take it  from one who knows, get these joy-sucking leeches out of your life! They serve no one but themselves and they don’t love anyone more than they love themselves. It’s evidenced by the their constant praising (of themselves) and kissing their own asses.  Oops, almost forgot, they’re smarter than everyone else on the planet and  they have no hesitation in telling you that…often. These nutters will drain the last ounce of breath out of your body and brain cells out of your head. They inherently aren’t worth what you go through to deal with them. They will never change but what they will do, is change YOU!

RUN!!!!! Your physical and emotional health depends on it!!!

We Salute Our Brave Men and Women In The Armed Forces!

Today is Armed Forces Day and as a person who knows many friends and family who have served, I can only say — I’m proud of your strength, courage, character, bravery and sense of duty. You’ve served your country well and to those still serving, stay safe, be well, know that our thoughts and prayers are with you and come home soon.

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One of My Favorite Quotes…

So we’ve all made it to the end of another work week or as a friend calls it “that’s life week”. Maybe the week was a breeze and maybe it wasn’t, but as with anything else in life, there’s pretty much always another shot to make it better. If you can, at the end of the day, file this week in the “been there…done that” then enjoy your weekend.

We can make the choice to either drown in our own self-pity or get our ass up and find a way to make our lives into what we want it to be. Is it hard…sometimes, will there always be a support system there to help you through it…not always, will there possibly be people in your life attempting to bring the drama, pain and negativity…Hell yes!.  But if you want something bad enough, then go for it and try to make it happen. Even if you think you’ve failed, at least you tried and that’s not a failure at all.

I firmly believe there’s always a solution to a problem,  however, you MUST have the patience, drive, focus and tenacity to find it…hang on that shit like a guard dog locked on a criminal’s neck.  I’ve said my piece and now I’m outta here…see ya!

yep

 

Weekend Hangout – The Birthday Continues…..River Cafe

After a wonderful celebration with family and friends in LA on my actual birthday of October 19th, my friends in New York planned a 2nd birthday celebration. This time it was in New York or Brooklyn to be exact, at the fabulous River Cafe. This place is hands down, one of my favorite places to dine. If you want to have a romantic evening or just gather with your family and friends, this is the place to be.

The River Café draws more New Yorkers and visitors into Brooklyn than just about any entity since Coney Island. It has been the location of many major films, hundreds of commercials and countless television shows. It has hosted many of the most famous – from within government and business to celebrity and royalty from around the world.

The River Cafe has won numerous awards including The 2012 Michelin Guide Award, Distinguished Restaurants of North America Award (DiRoNA), The New York Parks Council Award and The Municipal Arts Society Award.

I would highly recommend if you’re in New York, make a reservation, because if the food doesn’t do it for you (and it would be surprising if it doesn’t), the spectacular views and excellent service will have you hooked!

One Water Street

Brooklyn, New York 11201

718.522.5200

**After 5:00 p.m. each day, jackets are required for gentlemen in the Main Dining Room and the Bar. Ties and collared shirts are always preferred.

Appropriate clothing and footwear is always required in all areas at all times. Men wearing backless sandals are not permitted.

Weekend Hangout – Birthday Edition

I know I’ve been missing for a couple of weeks with the Weekend Hangout, but I was sick with terrible allergies. Now I’m back in time for my birthday! Today is the date my mom was in labor with me for 15 hours…as I’ve been told over the years, many, many times.  I can’t wait for a frozen strawberry margarita and some fun.

But because we are in rather tough times and my REAL favorite affordable Mexican food restaurant, Acapulco,  is no longer near where I live, I have rounded up a group of family and friends for Happy Hour at El Torito Grill.

I actually enjoy going there for Happy Hour in the Cantina. You can either sit indoors and enjoy some of the best chips, salsa and guacamole around or go out on the patio to enjoy the cool, mild LA evenings with drinks and friends in tow. Their Happy Hour lasts from 3 – 8 p.m….five hours to get your eat and drink on.  Another plus is  the staff… they’re so nice, friendly and accommodating. Ask for Lance, he’ll hook you up.

So if you’re ever in the Los Angeles area and looking for a good bang for your buck, stop by…you won’t be disappointed.

ET Grill

El Torito Grill

9595 Wilshire Blvd.

Beverly Hills, California 90210

Phone: 310-550-1599

Open Daily
Monday-Thursday 11:00am-9:00pm
Friday-Saturday 11:00am-10:00pm
Sunday 12:00am-9:00pm

Cantina Small Bites (7 Days/wk in the Cantina).

Drink Specials (M-F 3-8pm in the Cantina).

What Happens When a Friendship Turns to Sh*t?

“Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down”.  Oprah Winfrey

I know in every long-term friendship,  like with any other relationship, you’ll hit a bad patch. But what happens when you absolutely do not recognize the person who has been your best friend forever? This is a question that I thought I would never be compelled to ask. My best friend…my brother, has turned into someone I can’t comprehend nor understand. He’s sullen, sulking, combative, moody, irritable, defensive…whew, it’s exhausting. It’s as if he’s turned into some Jekyll and Hyde, walking advertisement for schizophrenic psychotropic drugs. I’ve tried to talk with him but I’ve hit a brick wall every damn time.

More than anything, this is the behavior that’s the most puzzling; we have always been able to talk about any subject or issue that was bothering us, now we can barely talk about anything. He’s had several life-changing events in his little slice of the world over the last year and a half and I understand that, but I’ve been there for him every step of the way. However, the blame-game is what’s troubling. It seems that everything that’s going wrong in his life or bothering him, is someone or something else’s fault or responsibility.

The environment around him is most times…toxic and I called him on it. But as usual, he started with a childish response instead of an adult solution. This type of erratic behavior has only made our relationship even more strained and splintered. Today for example, he went with me to a meeting and all the way there you could feel the tension in the car. Normally we’re laughing, joking and having fun, but oh no, not this time, it was awful. On the way back, it was more of the same and when we are out and about, we normally stop by his home to see my niece/god-daughter (a long story about that title) and I had made arrangements with his wife to do so because I hadn’t seen my little muffin for about a week.

He made an excuse about being too busy and I could “catch up tomorrow”. Excuse me, but tomorrow is Monday and I haven’t won the lottery, so I need to handle my business. This is uncharacteristic behavior and I’m at a loss on what to do. Before anyone starts with maybe his wife has something to do with us having issues (which has been brought up by others), she’s a genuinely nice person and it’s not in her personality to cause trouble. Believe me, I know what friends and relatives look like when they’re knifing you in the back. I also want people to know that my brother is not an inherently bad person either, he has a good heart but at this moment, that’s just hard to remember.

I have almost arrived at the conclusion that maybe we need a good long break from one another…maybe we’ve hit an insurmountable brick wall and it’s just best to change routes…I don’t know at this point. I want him in my life, but I’m not quite sure that he still wants me in his. He has never verbally indicated anything of the sort, but if it’s not that, then what? The one thing that I feel he resents is my friendship with his wife…he even said to her, “why were we communicating”, that I was HIS friend…HIS sister. But how can I have a relationship with my niece/god-daughter and him if I don’t have some sort of amicable relationship with his wife? You see, none of this makes sense.

I’m at a loss on how to fix this and for me, that’s a first. I don’t want to keep going around in circles with him nor do I want to walk on eggshells around him. It has almost become untenable and that has to stop. Do friendships have expiration dates or do we need to freeze them every once in a while to make them last longer? What to do……

“Though our communicatio…

“Though our communication wanes at times of absence, I’m aware of a strength that emanates in the background.”
-Claudette Renner